PBAM 1 – Coup De Grace
Can octopuses breathe out of water?
Tom: Give me Mein Kampf, my favourite novel
Cosby: It’s not a novel. I don’t know if you’ve read Mein Kampf, but it’s not a novel.
Tom: Oh, isn’t it?
Crosby: No.
Tom: Oh.
I bought a pumice stone yesterday – can you pumice your way down a shoe size?
PBAM 2 – Son of Catnip
Who’s the best martyr? Is there like, a martyr club?
Earth, Wind and Fire, right. Were they three guys, one nicknamed Earth, one nicknamed Wind and the other one Fire?
Would a shark on land be a little bit like a… I imagine it’d be a cross between a sausage dog and a rotweiller.
Fight or flight – how come they are the only two options?
PBAM 3 – Three Plastic Honkers
Imagine how dry you’d be if you worked in a talc factory…?
So is there a rivalry? Is the re a talcum powder factory on one side of the road, hot bath factory on the other?
What’s the word for omnipotent?
PBAM 4 – Merry Christmas Everyone
If you lived in Downton Abbey, could you, and a small team of people, play… say…The Bells of St Clements from being in different rooms?
Every girl’s a daughter, aren’t they? You don’t need to be with your Mum to be a daughter…everyone’s a daughter…if you’re female…
When a girl becomes a Mum, does she give up being a daughter?
Who was the actor whose party piece was to go and stand behind a curtain, and people would shout out emotions and he’d display them on his face…for like a minute?
PBAM 5 – Speaking of Backs
If you shave anything enough, it grows hair, isn’t it?
Is there nun prison?
“Oh, lades let me tell you – when I was in Morocco…” is that what a cad sounds like?
PBAM 6 – Entre-Pur-Pur
What if you think of the rat as a squirrel with no tail?
What if you think of dragons as dogs with wings?
Dragons don’t exist, do they?
Cats are a bit disturbing aren’t they, cause they’re sexy?
Do you think in 5 or 10 years time with all this global crisis we’re in, we’ll all be like Top Cat? Like, street dwelling entrepreneurs?
Is it morbid to ask how you’d prefer to die?
PBAM 7 – T-Bone Walks Alone
If you love life, do you either live it to the full, or do you protect your life?
Are leeks the flowers of the vegetable world?
Tom: Pride’s one of the Seven Deadly Sins, isn’t it?
Ben/Crosby: Yeah.
Tom: So maybe that’s the way I should work? Is that, you should know that they say that pride comes before a fall? Maybe every sin should come before a fall?
Pied Piper’s a strange tale when you think about it, isn’t it?
PBAM 8 – The Hidden Prrrp
Robins don’t just come out at Christmas, do they? Hibernate the rest of the year…they only live in England in December…
Society as a whole does wanna bang, doesn’t it?
Have you ever fake sleeped because you didn’t want to be in bed with someone?
Isn’t it weird that people had little, small doors 100 years ago?
So…a beanstalk…how exaggerated is that?
What’s the correct face to make when you fart really loudly at the urinal?
Tom: What’s the correct length of a play?
Crosby: We’re not having this discussion now, there is no correct length of a play.
PBAM 9 – Marcus Told Me
What do you think about me as a rapper? I’ve got lyrical dexterity, haven’t I?
PBAM 10 – Baggsy, Foggy, Dude
Have you ever sat in a bath?
Whose idea was it to sing Auld Lang Syne?
Can you hear that blink?
PBAM 11 – Cheers Everyone, Bye
Have you got, like a local…place?
Are there any other famous people who could be walking down the thing that they’re named after? (ref: Spiral Staircase)
Do they eat Arctic Roll in the Arctic?
PBAM 12 – Grin of Grimace
Is Denmark in Norway?
Are pygmies bigamists?
What inanimate object would you choose as your companion?
Louis Armstrong didn’t play the piano, did he?
Is a musical instrument an inanimate object?
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